RIGHT NOW I UNFORTUNATLY LIVE IN A SMALL TOWN KNOWN AS CRYSLER.IF YOUR PARENTS ARE THINKING OF MOVING TO THE COUNTRY, QUICKLY PACK YOUR BAGS AND RUN TO THE AIRPORT. THERE'S NOTHING TO DO OUT IN THE BOONIES.

-TWO GUYS ARE OUT IN THE DESERT AND ONE HAS TO GO RELIEVE HIMSELF. IN THE PROCESS A RATTLESNAKE BITES IN THE TENDER AREA. HE HOWLS IN PAIN AND SAYS "HEY, GO TO TOWN AND ASK THE DOCTOR WHAT TO DO?" HIS FRIEND GOES TO THE DOCTOR AND ASKS " MY FRIEND GOT BITTEN BY A RATTLESNAKE, WHAT DO I DO?" THE DOCTOR REPLIED " FIRST MAKE TWO CUTS AROUND THE WOUND AND SUCK OUT THE POISON." THE GUY GOES BACK TO HIS FRIEND. THE GUY WHO GOT BITTEN ASKED " WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO DO?" HIS FRIEND REPLIED "SORRY TO SAY PAL, BUT YOUR GONNA' DIE."
- ERMA: GARGE, PUT OUT THE GARBAGE.
GARGE: YOU COOKED IT,YOU TAKE IT OUT!
- WHAT'S THE NEWFIES NEWEST INVENTION? A SOLAR POWERED FLASHLIGHT!